


Be There With You

by thesometimeswarrior



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Episode: s04e24 I Am My Mom, Episode: s05e01 Stuck Together, Gen, Guardian-Ward Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Light Whump, Self-Sacrifice, Slavery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-11
Updated: 2019-01-11
Packaged: 2019-10-08 12:10:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17386217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesometimeswarrior/pseuds/thesometimeswarrior
Summary: It’s as if through a tunnel that Pearl hears Steven plead with the Aquamarine. “Just let me heal her!”She’d managed to get the words out. And, while she hadn’t convinced the Aquamarine to take her in Steven’splaceas she had hoped, at least now she’s goingwithhim. Will be able to stand between him and the Diamonds, protect him, devise a way to confess herself if necessary. And then they can shatter her, maim her, harvest her, do whatever they imagine fit for renegade Pearls and Diamond-shatterers, but they’ll let Steven go.She'll ensure they let Steven go.Pearl finds a loophole. Steven isn't alone.





	Be There With You

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick note that, while I wouldn't go so far as to say that this is a full-on dark fic, there's def dark elements to it, so please be warned.
> 
> In any case, I really hope you enjoy!
> 
> Title taken from _Gemcation_.

It’s as if through a tunnel that Pearl hears Steven plead with the Aquamarine. “Just let me heal her!”

Admittedly, she’s distracted. Her hands claw at her mouth like a punishment, and she feels a crack in her Gemstone—the natural consequence breaking an order—which sends shooting pains around her physical form, and has resulted in her legs stretching and distorting so that they can no longer support the rest of her. As such, they’d given out shortly after she was brought aboard the Aquamarine’s ship, and without the use of her hands to reposition herself, she remains in a heap as they speed toward Homeworld.

(Contrasted with this, the gauntlet-shaped bruises blooming into being near her hands seem almost negligible.)

( _Hold my wrists!_ she’d barked, pulling her arms out of the water to be within Garnet’s reach. _And whatever they try to do, don’t let them move!_ )

It had worked. She’d managed to get the words out. And, while she hadn’t convinced the Aquamarine to take her in Steven’s _place_ as she had hoped, at least now she’s going _with_ him. Will be able to stand between him and the Diamonds, protect him, devise a way to confess herself if necessary—possibly by means of projecting from her Gemstone?—and then they can shatter her, maim her, harvest her, do whatever they imagine fit for renegade Pearls and Diamond-shatterers—(she’s neither, not really, but the whole story has long since ceased to matter)—but they’ll let Steven go. 

She’ll ensure they let Steven go.

“Oh, very well,” the Aquamarine relents, finally. “I suppose a _Pearl’s_ not much of a threat. But if either of you try anything, Rosie, we might just have to hand your little human friend over to the Diamonds in pieces.”

The human releases a stifled cry. 

(Pearl should feel more concern, she knows, for this human than she is in fact able to bring herself to do. He’s a friend of Steven’s—one of the ones who works at the donut shop—and even if that weren’t true, Rose would have cared for him just by virtue of his being human. But she, Pearl, must focus on keeping _Steven_ safe, and the pain radiating from her Gemstone is enough of a distraction—she can’t afford another.)

“I won’t try anything, just…!” Steven’s voice, rings out with desperation, and, at the Aquamarine’s nod, the Topaz unfuses and puts him down. Steven promptly runs over to the corner in which Pearl is slumped, already licking his hand as he kneels down next to her. “Don’t worry, Pearl, I’m just gonna heal your Gemstone…”

“No.” The word just hardly escapes her hands as they continually paw at her mouth. But she brings it forth. 

“You…” Steven’s voice is all confusion, and for an instant, she sees herself through his eyes: Weak. Pathetic. Useless. These aren’t new epithets for her, of course, she feels them constantly, knows somewhere in her that they are the most accurate representations of herself. But to _him_ , she’s always made herself appear strong, an agent, even when she knew it was a lie. And it must be jarring for him—terrifying, even—to see her as she really is…as if there isn’t already enough about this situation to terrify him. His hand trembles as it hovers in the air. “You _don’t_ want me to heal you?”

Of course she doesn’t. She’d disobeyed a direct order—the _last_ direct order she’d received from her Diamond. She _deserves_ this. 

(Though, she has to believe that she acted as Rose would have wanted. Rose had asked her to look after her child—and, even if that dying request hadn’t been her primary motivation in the moment, wasn’t that what Pearl was doing? Besides, she didn’t reveal _everything_ , had kept the most pressing part of the secret in tact…)

(But it doesn’t _matter_. Even if it had been necessary for what Rose had wanted—never mind what Pearl herself wanted—she _disobeyed_. The ends don’t, _can’t_ , justify the means. She _deserves_ …)

(She’s _free_ , isn’t she? _Isn’t she_? Free to act as she sees fit. Free to do what she wants. She’s not bound, _shouldn’t_ be bound to orders…)

(Does she _want_ this?)

It’s an irrelevant question, she decides, finally meeting Steven’s eyes. She must be strong for him. Must do what she can to alleviate his fears. Must be able to protect him when it comes to it, and she can’t very well stand between him and the Diamonds if her legs don’t work. Won’t be able to project a confession from a broken Gemstone. 

“Never mind,” she manages to say. “Go...ahead. Please.”

Steven’s shoulders relax slightly as he complies, and relief spreads around her form instantly as his palm hand makes contact with her Gemstone. She sits up as her legs return to their normal state. 

He smiles, satisfied momentarily, but then furrows his eyebrows in confusion. “But your Gemstone is _fixed_. Why are your hands still…?”

“They’ll…settle down…eventually.” (She hopes.)

“Is it…is it _true_ , what you said? That _you_ shattered Pink Diamond? Not Mom?”

 _Yes. Well, sort of._ Pearl’s hands seize up on her mouth, and this time remain there until she manages to carefully articulate her response to herself. “It’s…painful…for me to…talk about.”

“I…But...” He sighs, relenting. “Okay.”

Pearl knows that he’s frustrated, that he wants answers, that he’d thought he finally figured out his history, finally had a handle on the Gem his mother was, and now she, Pearl, had entirely undermined that. And in light of everything, he’s _justified_. Entitled to the truth. _All_ of it. And, if she somehow manages to make it out of this ordeal intact, she will have to devise a way to explain it to him. 

But her escaping un-shattered is not a likely scenario. And even if it were, she cannot allow herself to think about what she would do afterward—she has to focus on that which is crucial right now. 

"I’m…not…going to let them…hurt you," she promises.

Steven blinks, then pouts. Tears well up in his eyes suddenly, and as soon as they do, they begin to chart courses down his cheeks in pent-up streams. He’s so used to having to be strong, Pearl realizes, to be a rock for the rest of them, that he desperately tried not to let his fear show before this moment. Even now, he blushes like he's ashamed of it, or at least ashamed of letting her see.

( _Stars_ , how long has it been since they allowed him to be a _child_?)

“Come…here,” she says, and Steven slowly obeys, lays his head down in her lap. Breathes shakily. Then again, a little bit less shakily. With a great deal of effort, Pearl pries one of her hands from her mouth and rests it on his head.

“I’m glad you’re here, Pearl,” he whispers.

“I am…too.”

They stay like that, feeling each other’s presence, until the Topazes come to collect them.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed! I love comments!


End file.
